I feel lonely.
I feel left behind.
I feel sad.
I feel like crying.
I feel bad.
I feel forgotten.
I feel shit.
I feel irrelevant.
I feel I don't exist.
I feel lonely.
I feel like shit.
I feel numb.
I feel unimportant.
I feel sick.
I want to cry.
I want to die.
I want to drink.
I want to shrink.
I want to smoke.
I want to choke.
I want to fuck.
I want to suck.
I want to drown.
I want to frown.
WHY DO I FEEL LIKE THIS?!?!?!
I hate this. I feel nobody remembers me. I feel I don't exist. I feel like an island written of the map due to rising sea levels. (WHAAAAAT?!?!?!) I can't keep myself busy enough to forget this. Every morning before going to bed, I always think about this.
Do my friends remember me? Do they still care about me? Do they know I'm still alive? I feel like they don't. Nobody ever asks me how I am these days.
I am used to being in the middle of everything. I want to be involved in everything, to be a part, to be included. Now that I'm away from them, I feel like I don't exist to them.
Sorry. I just want to vent it out. I've been feeling shit for weeks. If somebody asks how I am doing. I say I'm fine. But I'm not. I know this is quite confusing coz it's not organized. Sorry 'bout that.
One thing I want everyone to remember is NEVER EVER BELIEVE WHAT I SAY. I am lying most of the time.
So would you believe it?
2 comments:
hmm.... i bet going back to school will fix your depression :) when youre at school its impossible to not have close friends.... i suggest u make friends with the neighbors in the meantime? :) wishing good things to come your way hon <3
Thanks anon. :)
I don't know the neighbors, though. I've lived here all my life they probably know me. But they are the people who I am not comfortable with. They are adults in their 40's so... And the others are relatives. I am not a family person, the normal Filipino.
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